No buts allowed

Starting a new career later in life has hidden surprises in store for the unsuspecting pilgrim. I first noticed it 30 years ago when I started off training in a career where older students, they call them mature students nowadays, were training with those of us straight out of school. We used to pull faces on the inside every time one of them contributed to a class discussion. What they had to say had integrity, born of life experience - we had none and it was obvious. They had observations to make learnt from real life. We had read about what they were talking about in books.

Lately as I have observed older people starting new careers and done the same myself, I have realised it is not only when one is training for a new career there are obstacles to overcome, but it is also when one starts employment in the new career the challenges really begin.

The conclusion I have come to is humility is the key for successfully hurdling the obstacles. It takes humility to learn the ropes in any new position but for older people I suspect it is harder to take the humble option.

Here is some advice I would give myself if I was ever in that position again: 

1. Be prepared to be very humble. Old people aren't used to be bossed around and told how to do their job but that is what will happen to you when you start a new career. You will start the position as a learner whether you like it or not so you might as well have a teachable attitude. Worst case scenario you could find yourself being bossed around by someone years younger than you but experienced in the position.

2. Never argue with the boss or your workmates. They are always right even when they aren't. If you make a comment the boss or a colleague immediately takes umbrage to, do not continue the conversation. Change the subject the first chance you get.

3. Never assume you know what the best approach to take is in any situation. Always run your plan of attack past the boss. Ask questions to avoid potential stuff-ups.

4. Be slow to speak and quick to listen. Try not to talk about your past achievements or past experiences too much. Try not to come across as someone who knows a lot even if you do.

5. Avoid making black and white statements that people can instantly feel affronted by. Ask questions rather than making statements. That is turn the statement into a question. For example instead of saying "The councillors are paid too much money" turn it into "Do you think the councillors are paid too much money?"

6. Do whatever it takes to succeed in your new career. You are older, it takes longer to learn new skills so do overtime if necessary to get yourself up to speed. Be kind to yourself.

7. Be prepared for the inevitable drop in pay. When you start a new career especially one you have retrained for, you very likely will start on the pay scale as someone who has left school and undertaken the same training. All the life experience you have gained do not count when it comes to pay calculations.

You reap what you sow

Lately I have become aware how important choices are in our life. The choices I make today will have consequences tomorrow. My life today is an assortment of consequences that have resulted from earlier choices I have made. I am reaping the consequences of choices I have made earlier in my life which is quite a scary concept really. Some of those choices were made thirty years ago or more which tells me the effects of choices we make as a young person can ripple throughout a lifetime.

What started me thinking about choices was listening to people talk about their lives. It would appear that many feel entrapped in their situation like they have no choice about what happens in their lives. It may be a little simplistic of me but I think that is a load of cobblers. The only thing that traps most people is attitude. We always have a choice. Even shackled hand and foot by heavy chains in a dark dungeon we have choices albeit limited.

Some choices revolve around the thoughts and attitudes I choose to have. The attitude I choose in response to a situation can seriously influence my  perspective of that situation and whether I prosper or decline in it. I know the difference choosing to have a positive attitude can make.  I have just completed two and a half years relatively happily in a job I did not especially feel at ease in just by choosing to tell myself the positive aspects of the job, being careful not to give the negative side any attention.

Some choices are more tangible like where I have chosen to live or work or how I decide to spend my spare time.

I suspect that many of the choices I have made up to this point of my life have not been particularly well-thought out. The bigger decisions probably were but there have been times when I have been careless to consider the long-term consequences of a decision. For example my decision  to train and work as a journalist. What possessed me to do that? I am not so sure in hindsight. I have never been interested in reading the newspaper. What made me think I would have the heart to write news stories? I am not saying it was not an enjoyable experience or that it has not had huge benefits to my character but I do not have much in common with the media industry.

If I am making sensible, calculated choices the chances are the choices I make will be determined by what I value. If cats are my favourite animal it is hard to see myself getting a puppy and taking it to dog obedience classes. If my family are important to me the chances are I will prioritise spending time with them.

So I think in future I will start making choices far more critically by examining what I value and then making choices accordingly. Which brings me to the coup de grace of my ruminatings about choices.

Why do I complain about my life when who I am today, living the life I have today, is the result of choices I have made?